'I've said NO to endless opportunities, and I see how huge the impact has really been on me. I did that because I had an obsession with comparison.'
'It hurts to talk about this, because I don't think I can without feeling embarrassed about it! That a grown woman, nearly 50 can still be doing this stuff like a school girl'
'I just want to give this up, stop killing my own happiness with doing it and finding new ways to stay doing it'
'It used to be in sport mainly, and then when I got into a new career path it began showing up often. I put it down as being a female minority with a boys club led establishment. But soon found out that the main pain was coming from my own punishment actions, and I found this out as I left to start my own business.
'I delayed getting proposals out, I delayed posting on social media or sending out newsletters, I delayed accepting invitations to events till last minute - because I'd be checking who was attending and if I could 'hold my own' amongst the group if I was caught having to speak to any of THOSE women'
'It was much more than saying I'm not as good as what xxxxxx is doing it like'
'It hurts more than that. It gets into a mantra that takes your breath for a minute and a small scream can be heard inside my gut, when I want to show up, but feel trapped behind this glass screen that is all about not being good enough'
This is some of the dialogue a beautiful woman brought to me this week
She noticed one of my Facebook Ads, and was intrigued to find out what her Money Personality was and if it offered some ways to help her change out of this dominating debilitating comparison-i-tis.
She listened to the recordings, listening to a few replays around her Archetypes and felt a very powerful truth from 'Ruler' being in full agreement of the challenge side of 'Perfectionism, Punishment, Loneliness' that she found herself with tears falling gently, as she dropped her shoulder, unclenched her jaw and gave into the learning!! In a way it was like coming home to HERSELF!
She was drawn to do the Personal Insights Breakthrough exercise in the free mini-course (Crack Your Money Code) It helped her begin to acknowledge she was craving more leisure time, nature, something more fulfilling to let herself be absorbed into that wasn't competitive, or that her mind wasn't as eager to find reasons to match.
This has all happened within a few days! Yep pretty quickly!
She sent me the first part of this as a messenger to thank me for these tools and how all though she hasn't used them specifically for her business as yet, she has had a massive shift in how she feels about herself, and that connected into her business brand and what she will look to change in how she works, what she offers, what her pricing is, who will be the people she works with.
She is beginning to see herself as 'Ruler' - Courageous, Visionary, Determined. That those are her natural strengths and they don't belong outside of her, they cant be taken away, they were packed into her DNA for a reason to be used in this world, that's why she is still here on earth - her unique message is still valuable and with purpose.
If you can identify with this beautiful woman, I get it. I feel you, and encourage you to do the work in learning how to get beyond this glass wall that is an illusion playing an old story into your soul. That it is safe for you to crack through.
Only good will come when you make aligning back to you natural gifts and living from that authentic truth!
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Sharyn Swan is The Dot Connector, guiding GenX women to embrace themselves as truly worthy and wealthy by aligning their business practices to their natural gifts and strengths!
Her latest offering is The SMASH Programme, a transformative 12-week money mindset makeover, helping women to embrace their skills, crack the money code on their finances and focus their attention where it's needed most.